Motherhood - a new job

When you have a child, you are thrown into a new job. Sometimes it feels like a complete change in careers, other times it simply adds on to the job you already have. And for many wonderful mothers, they still have to work during the day, and come home to their husbands and children and work again - often through the night. I admire those mothers greatly.

But what comes with this new job? For me, it comes with a lot of joy, definitely stress, hard-work, learning, crying, and sometimes feeling scared and insecure. Like many mothers, the first baby is almost your "trial and error" baby, because you are trying to do everything everyone has told you to do, and then realize none of it works - because, as I've said before, every child is different. So then you learn, and grow together, and slowly work your way into a schedule of sorts. But then, there are those days, when whatever you do - even if it seems to have worked a thousand times before - nothing you do is stopping your child from crying. You wonder if it's your fault, you wonder if they are hurting, and you wish desperately that they could just talk to you and tell you what's wrong. But they can't, and we must struggle to learn patience, long-suffering, and allow our love for them to help us through.

Motherhood, I am learning, is one of THE most stressful jobs on the body I will ever have. Sleep is almost non-existent at times, food is rushed and cold, your back almost constantly aches from lifting, showers are rushed and never alone, and often you find you are losing your hair and grinding your teeth at night. Which, by the way, cause horrible and unwanted headaches during the day. Why didn't our mothers tell us about this? Why weren't we warned? Probably because we wouldn't ever want to have children if we knew. But I am glad they don't tell us - because who would really want to miss out on the infinite joy that comes from your child? A spirit child of our Heavenly Father, given to us to watch over and protect.

I'll admit, there are MANY nights where I cringe when I hear Alex cry, and I simply want to throw my pillow over my head and pretend it's not MY child crying. And often, after dragging myself out of bed to feed him, or change his diaper, I quietly go back to bed and secretly pray that he wont wake up again - at least for another two to three hours. There are times when I feel so apprehensive about him waking up, I end up not getting any sleep because I am so afraid to hear his cry at any moment. Talk about the big stress right there. This is all definitely a learning experience for me. I keep telling myself to just sleep, and not worry about Alex waking up at all - but who will tell my teeth to stop grinding while I sleep?

Motherhood is hard work, it really is a full-time job! No matter what else you do. And there is usually no vacation time from it, no bonuses for it, and definitely very little health benefits from it. But as a new mother, I have hope. I am excited for my child's future, and even secretly desire to have a few more right away. Why would I want more right away? Well, being a mother - even without the parades and praises we should receive for it - does have it's little celebrations. Like watching your baby roll over by themselves for the first time! Or even finally hold their heads up by themselves. I cannot even describe the joy that comes to your heart at those times.

Being a mother is hard....but that is also what makes those small accomplishments so worth it!