After a long battle with myself over whether or not I should continue breastfeeding Alex, I have decided to call it quits. This has been a true struggle for me, because the entire time I felt like I need to be ashamed for even considering stopping. I felt as though all of my family members and few friends were going to ridicule me, or worse, lecture me about being a selfish mother. After all, I was told that "A baby should be breastfed until at least a year old." "If you can breastfeed your child than do it! They get more nutrition from you than anywhere else." Even now, it still scares me to stop breastfeeding Alex. He is, after all, just eight months old now.
However, this past month has been a very hard struggle for me with breastfeeding. Mainly I feel Alex knows he doesn't have to eat his baby food, because he knows he'll get food from me later. He has also begun to grab at my shirt and try to pull it down to eat from me. That is the most annoying and embarressing thing EVER! And I don't want him to EVER think he can do that to me - especially in public. Some mothers may laugh and say it's cute, funny, or just him showing he knows where the food comes from. But for me, it's bothersome and embarressing. Also, he has been THE most distracted breastfeeder ever! He just doesn't eat like he used to. Except at night, when he's half asleep anyways.
So, today I've decided that it is going to be best for both of us if I start weaning him off of me. I'll start doing some formula to compensate, at least until he's a year old. But I am hoping he will be completely weaned off of me by the time he is 9 to 10 months old. Definitely off of me completely by 10 months though. And yes, this really was a tough decision. Because I do love feeding him from me - there is something so tender and sweet in those moments, and I'll never forget them. But, when it gets annoying and frustrating for both people, it's time to stop.
So, ridicule and shun me all you want! I am refusing to budge from this decision. I know it is going to be what is best for both me and Alex.
You are a great mom, and don't feel bad about what you feel is best for both you and your baby. I stopped breastfeeding at 6 months, and although I would have liked to nurse longer, it just wasn't working out for me or the baby. So don't let anyone tell you what to do or make you feel ashamed about it. You are the only person who can make those decisions for you and your baby! :)
ReplyDeleteI am so glad you posted this. I went through the same thing with my first...except that she was only 6 weeks. She wasn't getting satisfied and I fought with myself for over 2 months before I decided that she (and I) would be so much happier if I quit~ You are doing an amazing job with little Alex. He won't think any less of you for doing what is best for you!
ReplyDeleteMo!! I most certainly don't/won't judge you for this decision! Eight months is fantastic. There's no concrete rule that says it has to be a year, and you know your baby and what he needs. Reed weaned himself, no joke, at 11 months. I probably could've stopped at 9.5 months, in fact, because he was so distracted. It made me crazy! He would be really only close to me by the mouth....the rest of him was just going crazy with whatever he could find! Savanna lost interest herself, too, though at 13 months. Jaxon was by far my most enthusiastic nurser and the hardest to wean, not wanting to stop (when I HAD to because he was 14 months old, BITING me, and I was pregnant with Savanna...). Anyway. I know you didn't need to hear all of that. I just wanted you to know that I believe you know your baby best, and that you are making good decisions!! Love ya. :)
ReplyDeleteWow, I've tried twice now to post a comment! First time it was my phone being dumb, and the second time, I wasn't signed in yet and the computer fritzed on me. :(
ReplyDeleteEach time it was a really long comment, too... *sigh*
But I am determined to tell you that you are a wonderful mother, and no one should reprimand you for your decision.
It's easy to feel judged when we end up doing something that isn't what we first thought would be best. When I didn't reach the 12-month mark I'd set for us, I felt like other mothers might think I wasn't trying hard enough.
But Ender just wasn't interested anymore. We struggled from 6-9 months, and at 9 months, he completely quit. He loved his baby food (as long as it wasn't green), and I'd supplemented just enough with formula that he preferred having a bottle. (Long story how that started--I talked about it in the last comment that got ditched, but I feel all storied out now!)
I fully support you, Mo! I know it's a different "problem" with Alex than it was with Ender, but I do understand your feelings! And I'm on board with your decision!