After reading and pondering more on my last post with Bob Stein's thoughts, I realized that there are probably some things I should stand up and speak for. Those who know me really well, (mainly 1-2 close family members, a friend or two, and my wonderful amazing husband); know that I am not a confrontational person. At all. In fact, I try to avoid it as much as possible. I don't like arguments - even philosophical and political "friendly" arguments. They honestly make me uncomfortable. Call it cowardice, weakness, stupidity, childlike, or even naive if you will! But that is me. I may put up a strong "tough girl" front all of the time, but it's really my shield. A way to steer clear of confrontation. As much as I try to keep my emotions in check, they tend to live on the surface most days. I know I hardly, if ever, talk about my religion anywhere or to anybody. And it's because I don't want people, especially those I love and respect, to knock it down, to trash it, demean it, or belittle its significance. Anything that I hold precious and dear to me I keep very close. My family, for example, I keep VERY close to me. I try to call, contact, keep in touch through faceboook, or letters with each and every one of them. Because, as nagging to them as it may be, I love them and never want to lose touch with them.
My belief is the same to me. I am selfish about both, and tend to not want to share any of them. I guess with family, it is all right to be selfish sometimes. But I realize, I shouldn't be so selfish with the things I believe in. (Okay, here comes a little more background of me). I was born and raised as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I grew up with my parents testimonies giving strength to my own. I remember that I LOVED going to primary every Sunday; learning at an early age of my Savior Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father. I can still sing many primary songs, and they always bring happiness and comfort to me. I remember the first time I read the Book of Mormon all the way through on my own, and how I felt the first time I prayed to know if it was true. I was thirteen years old, and felt the Holy Ghost testify to me it was true. I also remember reading and learning about our modern day prophets and apostles, and know that they are men called of God. But most importantly, I remember the day I gained a firm testimony and knowledge that Jesus is the Christ, the only begotten Son of our Heavenly Father. And how that knowledge helped me realize that I am a daughter of God! And He hears and answers my prayers. I know this, because I have seen it throughout my whole life. Jesus Christ is my Savior and my best friend! He is always there, and I constantly speak with him through prayer; both in my heart and on my knees.
I may not shout my belief's from the roof tops, or readily share it with a passing stranger - I think I am still too shy for that. But I do want it known that I believe in Jesus Christ, that He came to this earth to save all men (and women) from sin. I know He gave His life for us, because He loved/loves us that much. I also know that the Book of Mormon is true. And that Joseph Smith was called of God to establish His church on the earth once more. I also want it known that I know our current prophet , President Thomas S. Monson, is called of God to help lead us through these latter days. This is my testimony and my belief's, and if you want to question it fine. I'll answer as best as I can, and pray that you question with an open mind and heart to what I have to say. I will continue to pray for courage and strength to share this belief with others, and hope that they will be kind enough to listen.
For those who may have questions now, I know of an awesome website! :) Most have probably already heard about it, but it's www.mormon.org. I actually enjoy that website myself, and hope you will too.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Friday, November 18, 2011
Not My Own Thoughts, But Definitely Thought Provoking...
After reading this from one of my friends pages, and double checking the sources and validity of it online, I thought this was worth sharing.
Apparently the White House referred to Christmas Trees as Holiday Trees for the first time this year which prompted CBS presenter, Ben Stein, to present this piece which I would like to share with you. I think it applies just as much to many countries as it does to America .
The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary....
My confession:
I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees, Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are, Christmas trees.
It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, 'Merry Christmas' to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu . If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.
I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from, that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.
Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God ? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where these celebrities came from and where the America we knew went to.
In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.
Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her 'How could God let something like this happen?' (regarding Hurricane Katrina).. Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, 'I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives. And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?'
In light of recent events... terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill; thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.
Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said okay.
Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.
Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'
Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell. Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says. Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.
Are you laughing yet?
Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.
Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.
Pass it on if you think it has merit.
If not, then just discard it.... no one will know you did. But, if you discard this thought process, don't sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in.
My Best Regards, Honestly and respectfully,
Ben Stein
Apparently the White House referred to Christmas Trees as Holiday Trees for the first time this year which prompted CBS presenter, Ben Stein, to present this piece which I would like to share with you. I think it applies just as much to many countries as it does to America .
The following was written by Ben Stein and recited by him on CBS Sunday Morning Commentary....
My confession:
I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees, Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are, Christmas trees.
It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, 'Merry Christmas' to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu . If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.
I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from, that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.
Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship celebrities and we aren't allowed to worship God ? I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too. But there are a lot of us who are wondering where these celebrities came from and where the America we knew went to.
In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.
Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her 'How could God let something like this happen?' (regarding Hurricane Katrina).. Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, 'I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives. And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?'
In light of recent events... terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found a few years ago) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK. Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill; thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.
Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave, because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said okay.
Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.
Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with 'WE REAP WHAT WE SOW.'
Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell. Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says. Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing. Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.
Are you laughing yet?
Funny how when you forward this message, you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it.
Funny how we can be more worried about what other people think of us than what God thinks of us.
Pass it on if you think it has merit.
If not, then just discard it.... no one will know you did. But, if you discard this thought process, don't sit back and complain about what bad shape the world is in.
My Best Regards, Honestly and respectfully,
Ben Stein
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Pregnancy, Fall, Family, and other SUPER LATE Updates
It has been a long time since I blogged...I guess I just haven't known what to say. Oddly enough, since most people who know me really well, know I like to speak my mind often. Looking at my last post I had to laugh a little, since - for those who don't know - I am about 15 weeks pregnant with our second baby. So many things have been happening, I don't even know where to begin. Or, even if I should elaborate on the past months.
I guess we'll start with the pregnancy. Alex has been doing REALLY well at night, getting up maybe once every night, if at all. Xander and I had started talking about the possibility of having another child, and what that would do to us and our current "college family" life. It took us almost a year to get pregnant with Alex, so, being the silly girl that I am, I assumed it would take us at LEAST six months to get pregnant with number two. We started trying a month before Alex's first birthday, and got pregnant on the first try. It was a huge shock to us, pleasant though. I was personally unprepared for it, expecting a much longer period of trying. After some time though, as I suppose happens with most women, I became rather excited to have another child.
Getting through this first trimester has been a lot harder than it was when I was pregnant with Alex. I am sick and tired a lot more often, I can't seem to keep anything down - especially sugar. Which, I suppose is a good thing, since I could only keep sugary foods down with Alex. Having a one year old who needs/wants your constant attention, and who is just starting to walk everywhere, is VERY taxing on my already tired and starving body. I am constantly feeling like a horrible mother to Alex! He doesn't always get the best meals, and rarely gets baths now - which is his favorite thing. I'm lucky if I can get more than two baths in a week for him. I feel horrible about it, and helpless too. Whenever I try to get up and do things, my energy lasts about ten minutes, if I'm lucky. I feel trapped in another woman's ailing body.
I had high hopes for my second trimester, since my first pregnancy I never felt better after week 14. But so far, I am still sick, and can't keep a lot of food down. Every pregnancy is so different! And I am just hoping after another week I'll finally have that "burst of energy" they talk about in the second trimester. I am so ready to be done with the sick, and finally able and capable of taking care of my family again.
Fall has become my favorite time of year! I love the changing colors, the colder (but not freezing) weather change, and especially all the holidays that come with it. These holidays always make me homesick. And I look forward to Christmas so much faster each year.
AND THANK GOODNESS FOR FAMILY! My wonderful mother sent my little sister Leah out to help me for a week, and she has definitely been a godsend. And on top of that, my little brother also cam up to help, and my wonderful big sister Annie came to help, and will be coming up again (with my sister Clare) on Monday to have Halloween with us, and also help. Such charity, love, and support from all of them has been so wonderful, that it constantly brings tears to my eyes. How I love family. Lately I have been so homesick for all of them, even my extended Brown family, that I told my husband it was time to go home again. Of course, being the wonderful practical man he is, he told me I was already home.
However, this got us to talking about our future after school, and we both feel that we need to be in the Kansas City, MO, area (close, but not overly close, to our families). After we decided I felt so excited and now anxious for Xander to graduate. There is nothing more important to me than family. And I want my children to know their cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles. I want them to be best friends growing up.
Well, this happens every time I post something - SORRY! - I always end up venting my mind out, and you end up getting a bunch of words instead of pictures. I'm not the best blogger ever, but oh well! :) I do like to speak my mind.
I guess we'll start with the pregnancy. Alex has been doing REALLY well at night, getting up maybe once every night, if at all. Xander and I had started talking about the possibility of having another child, and what that would do to us and our current "college family" life. It took us almost a year to get pregnant with Alex, so, being the silly girl that I am, I assumed it would take us at LEAST six months to get pregnant with number two. We started trying a month before Alex's first birthday, and got pregnant on the first try. It was a huge shock to us, pleasant though. I was personally unprepared for it, expecting a much longer period of trying. After some time though, as I suppose happens with most women, I became rather excited to have another child.
Getting through this first trimester has been a lot harder than it was when I was pregnant with Alex. I am sick and tired a lot more often, I can't seem to keep anything down - especially sugar. Which, I suppose is a good thing, since I could only keep sugary foods down with Alex. Having a one year old who needs/wants your constant attention, and who is just starting to walk everywhere, is VERY taxing on my already tired and starving body. I am constantly feeling like a horrible mother to Alex! He doesn't always get the best meals, and rarely gets baths now - which is his favorite thing. I'm lucky if I can get more than two baths in a week for him. I feel horrible about it, and helpless too. Whenever I try to get up and do things, my energy lasts about ten minutes, if I'm lucky. I feel trapped in another woman's ailing body.
I had high hopes for my second trimester, since my first pregnancy I never felt better after week 14. But so far, I am still sick, and can't keep a lot of food down. Every pregnancy is so different! And I am just hoping after another week I'll finally have that "burst of energy" they talk about in the second trimester. I am so ready to be done with the sick, and finally able and capable of taking care of my family again.
Fall has become my favorite time of year! I love the changing colors, the colder (but not freezing) weather change, and especially all the holidays that come with it. These holidays always make me homesick. And I look forward to Christmas so much faster each year.
AND THANK GOODNESS FOR FAMILY! My wonderful mother sent my little sister Leah out to help me for a week, and she has definitely been a godsend. And on top of that, my little brother also cam up to help, and my wonderful big sister Annie came to help, and will be coming up again (with my sister Clare) on Monday to have Halloween with us, and also help. Such charity, love, and support from all of them has been so wonderful, that it constantly brings tears to my eyes. How I love family. Lately I have been so homesick for all of them, even my extended Brown family, that I told my husband it was time to go home again. Of course, being the wonderful practical man he is, he told me I was already home.
However, this got us to talking about our future after school, and we both feel that we need to be in the Kansas City, MO, area (close, but not overly close, to our families). After we decided I felt so excited and now anxious for Xander to graduate. There is nothing more important to me than family. And I want my children to know their cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles. I want them to be best friends growing up.
Well, this happens every time I post something - SORRY! - I always end up venting my mind out, and you end up getting a bunch of words instead of pictures. I'm not the best blogger ever, but oh well! :) I do like to speak my mind.
Monday, May 23, 2011
Sleeping Through the Night...Time for Another One??
Lately Alex has been wonderful enough to sleep all night for me. He has been doing this for the past two weeks now, and I'm wondering when he'll suddenly stop and make me get up again with him. Sometimes I'll hear him up and talking, or crying slightly, but I usually give it anywhere from five to ten minutes before checking on him. Because, lately he has been putting himself back to sleep. SUPER nice! I think having a set bedtime routine/schedule every night has definitely helped.
As taking care of Alex has become a lot easier, and our daily routine has become more set in stone, my mind - almost guiltily - wanders to having baby number two. The thought is slightly exciting and yet very frightening. Xander and I have talked about it, and are not sure when would be the best time to even start. Originally we had planned on waiting until he was done with school - Alex would be a little over two years old by then. But, I'm not sure I want to have my kids more than two years apart. Part of me just wants to have them and get the whole process over with - the other part tells me I am being selfish and that we need to do what is best for our current situation. As we talked about it some more, and realized that Xander will be leaving for his internship anywhere between January and May 2012, we decided that we would either have to have the baby around May, or after August.
As much planning as I like to do though, I know that it is all in Heavenly Father's hands. He knows when we should have baby number two, and when the best time will be. I just wish I could in on that little tidbit of information. :) Another thing that has been nagging at me though, is my weight. I told myself that I did not want to be as heavy and out of shape as I was with Alex. I would prefer to be at LEAST 30 lbs lighter from my current weight. (I'm 177 if you must know). ;) However, I realize that the amount of weight is not as important as my body being healthy. The truth is, I hate working out. I absolutely LOVE the results, but hate the effort and diligence that must be put into it. I wish there was a magic pill for this sort of thing, but there isn't. And even a pill wont help in the long run.
All right, so there really wasn't much of a point to all of this ranting and blabbering. I just thought I would share some different things happening with us. On a side note, Xander is still doing great with school, and I am trying to walk everyday with Alex. :) Thankfully the weather has decided to be nice again. AND we are getting ready for another move. Just to an apartment, as the people we are currently renting from will be back in August. Life is good.
As taking care of Alex has become a lot easier, and our daily routine has become more set in stone, my mind - almost guiltily - wanders to having baby number two. The thought is slightly exciting and yet very frightening. Xander and I have talked about it, and are not sure when would be the best time to even start. Originally we had planned on waiting until he was done with school - Alex would be a little over two years old by then. But, I'm not sure I want to have my kids more than two years apart. Part of me just wants to have them and get the whole process over with - the other part tells me I am being selfish and that we need to do what is best for our current situation. As we talked about it some more, and realized that Xander will be leaving for his internship anywhere between January and May 2012, we decided that we would either have to have the baby around May, or after August.
As much planning as I like to do though, I know that it is all in Heavenly Father's hands. He knows when we should have baby number two, and when the best time will be. I just wish I could in on that little tidbit of information. :) Another thing that has been nagging at me though, is my weight. I told myself that I did not want to be as heavy and out of shape as I was with Alex. I would prefer to be at LEAST 30 lbs lighter from my current weight. (I'm 177 if you must know). ;) However, I realize that the amount of weight is not as important as my body being healthy. The truth is, I hate working out. I absolutely LOVE the results, but hate the effort and diligence that must be put into it. I wish there was a magic pill for this sort of thing, but there isn't. And even a pill wont help in the long run.
All right, so there really wasn't much of a point to all of this ranting and blabbering. I just thought I would share some different things happening with us. On a side note, Xander is still doing great with school, and I am trying to walk everyday with Alex. :) Thankfully the weather has decided to be nice again. AND we are getting ready for another move. Just to an apartment, as the people we are currently renting from will be back in August. Life is good.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Food Update
First of all...Thanks everyone for the reassurance and support for the bottle feeding! And the baby food. It's always nice to know you're not alone in those things.
As for an update, I have stopped worrying about his eating habits so much. Don't get me wrong, I still worry, just not as much. Alex eats - mainly orange foods and now fruit (As long as there are bananas in them). And has been absolutely LOVING his bottle and formula. He gets so excited every time he sees me shaking up his bottle. It actually makes me feel pretty happy and excited as well. However, I only give it to him twice a day, and the rest of the day is water. He still doesn't like drinking juice. Oddly enough, since he has now realized he likes to eat fruit. As for the vegetables, anything orange is a go. So, I have learned to mix those orange veggies with others, and he still gobbles them up.
It has been such a relief having him eat again. However, it still gets frustrating when he gets distracted or starts spitting food at me. I have come to realize that he just wants to feed himself. And sadly, I have to let him. I say SADLY because he makes such a mess...and I have to clean him up. Yes, I knew that was part of the job description when I became a mother, but it doesn't mean I have to like it! :)
Since he likes to feed himself so much - and I mean, he really does enjoy it a lot. I have started giving him table foods - super soft and cooked veggies. Like corn, carrots, sweet and regular peas, bread, and some fruits. Most of it ends up between his legs or on the floor, but it's a little easier to clean up than baby food. Now that feeding is becoming less of an issue, I have been able to relax a little more and get him down to a schedule. It's been wonderful! He has been so much happier and relaxed. And much easier to handle too. It almost makes me want to start on number two...ALMOST. But not quite. ;)
As for an update, I have stopped worrying about his eating habits so much. Don't get me wrong, I still worry, just not as much. Alex eats - mainly orange foods and now fruit (As long as there are bananas in them). And has been absolutely LOVING his bottle and formula. He gets so excited every time he sees me shaking up his bottle. It actually makes me feel pretty happy and excited as well. However, I only give it to him twice a day, and the rest of the day is water. He still doesn't like drinking juice. Oddly enough, since he has now realized he likes to eat fruit. As for the vegetables, anything orange is a go. So, I have learned to mix those orange veggies with others, and he still gobbles them up.
It has been such a relief having him eat again. However, it still gets frustrating when he gets distracted or starts spitting food at me. I have come to realize that he just wants to feed himself. And sadly, I have to let him. I say SADLY because he makes such a mess...and I have to clean him up. Yes, I knew that was part of the job description when I became a mother, but it doesn't mean I have to like it! :)
Since he likes to feed himself so much - and I mean, he really does enjoy it a lot. I have started giving him table foods - super soft and cooked veggies. Like corn, carrots, sweet and regular peas, bread, and some fruits. Most of it ends up between his legs or on the floor, but it's a little easier to clean up than baby food. Now that feeding is becoming less of an issue, I have been able to relax a little more and get him down to a schedule. It's been wonderful! He has been so much happier and relaxed. And much easier to handle too. It almost makes me want to start on number two...ALMOST. But not quite. ;)
Thursday, April 28, 2011
No More Breastfeeding!
After a long battle with myself over whether or not I should continue breastfeeding Alex, I have decided to call it quits. This has been a true struggle for me, because the entire time I felt like I need to be ashamed for even considering stopping. I felt as though all of my family members and few friends were going to ridicule me, or worse, lecture me about being a selfish mother. After all, I was told that "A baby should be breastfed until at least a year old." "If you can breastfeed your child than do it! They get more nutrition from you than anywhere else." Even now, it still scares me to stop breastfeeding Alex. He is, after all, just eight months old now.
However, this past month has been a very hard struggle for me with breastfeeding. Mainly I feel Alex knows he doesn't have to eat his baby food, because he knows he'll get food from me later. He has also begun to grab at my shirt and try to pull it down to eat from me. That is the most annoying and embarressing thing EVER! And I don't want him to EVER think he can do that to me - especially in public. Some mothers may laugh and say it's cute, funny, or just him showing he knows where the food comes from. But for me, it's bothersome and embarressing. Also, he has been THE most distracted breastfeeder ever! He just doesn't eat like he used to. Except at night, when he's half asleep anyways.
So, today I've decided that it is going to be best for both of us if I start weaning him off of me. I'll start doing some formula to compensate, at least until he's a year old. But I am hoping he will be completely weaned off of me by the time he is 9 to 10 months old. Definitely off of me completely by 10 months though. And yes, this really was a tough decision. Because I do love feeding him from me - there is something so tender and sweet in those moments, and I'll never forget them. But, when it gets annoying and frustrating for both people, it's time to stop.
So, ridicule and shun me all you want! I am refusing to budge from this decision. I know it is going to be what is best for both me and Alex.
However, this past month has been a very hard struggle for me with breastfeeding. Mainly I feel Alex knows he doesn't have to eat his baby food, because he knows he'll get food from me later. He has also begun to grab at my shirt and try to pull it down to eat from me. That is the most annoying and embarressing thing EVER! And I don't want him to EVER think he can do that to me - especially in public. Some mothers may laugh and say it's cute, funny, or just him showing he knows where the food comes from. But for me, it's bothersome and embarressing. Also, he has been THE most distracted breastfeeder ever! He just doesn't eat like he used to. Except at night, when he's half asleep anyways.
So, today I've decided that it is going to be best for both of us if I start weaning him off of me. I'll start doing some formula to compensate, at least until he's a year old. But I am hoping he will be completely weaned off of me by the time he is 9 to 10 months old. Definitely off of me completely by 10 months though. And yes, this really was a tough decision. Because I do love feeding him from me - there is something so tender and sweet in those moments, and I'll never forget them. But, when it gets annoying and frustrating for both people, it's time to stop.
So, ridicule and shun me all you want! I am refusing to budge from this decision. I know it is going to be what is best for both me and Alex.
To eat, or not to eat...
Feeding Alex baby food has definitely been a struggle for me. I keep hearing all of these stories from my friends who have or have had babies, that they just LOVED their baby food, and it was so much fun feeding them. I am not so lucky. Alex hates his baby food - unless of course it's sweet potatoes, banana mango smoothie, or oatmeal. Those are the only things he likes to eat with vigor. Not a very healthy diet alone, so other things must be forced upon him.
He is a VERY stubborn boy! (No question where he gets THAT from, I know.) And He keeps his mouth tightly shut when he doesn't like what we're feeding him. We have to pursuade him to open his mouth by making him laugh, blowing in his face, or even try to pry it open with his spoon. It has been a struggle trying to feed him - he just doesn't like anything but me. And, as flattering as that is, he is also becoming a horribly distracted nurser. He eats for 3-4 minutes then pulls away and wants to crawl away. It worries me that he may not be getting enough nourishment, or even enough to drink. Did I mention he also HATES his juice? What kind of a kid hates juice?? Oh wait, Mine does. At least he likes water well enough. Thank goodness for that!
Anyways, it has all been in vain it seems, and I can't comprehend in the least what that kid of mine is thinking. I can't believe I birthed such a picky eater! For pete's sake, I love food! And so does Xander, so why does our son hate it? *sigh* It is definitely frustrating for me...and I am trying so hard to understand what he wants, and how I can make sure he is getting enough to eat. Maybe, since he is teething really bad, that is the reason. I just don't know yet, but I am losing heart everytime he refuses to eat. Hopefully we can try better as time goes on. And hopefully this is just a phase he is going through. We'll find out. Anyways, just me venting some frustrations.
He is a VERY stubborn boy! (No question where he gets THAT from, I know.) And He keeps his mouth tightly shut when he doesn't like what we're feeding him. We have to pursuade him to open his mouth by making him laugh, blowing in his face, or even try to pry it open with his spoon. It has been a struggle trying to feed him - he just doesn't like anything but me. And, as flattering as that is, he is also becoming a horribly distracted nurser. He eats for 3-4 minutes then pulls away and wants to crawl away. It worries me that he may not be getting enough nourishment, or even enough to drink. Did I mention he also HATES his juice? What kind of a kid hates juice?? Oh wait, Mine does. At least he likes water well enough. Thank goodness for that!
Anyways, it has all been in vain it seems, and I can't comprehend in the least what that kid of mine is thinking. I can't believe I birthed such a picky eater! For pete's sake, I love food! And so does Xander, so why does our son hate it? *sigh* It is definitely frustrating for me...and I am trying so hard to understand what he wants, and how I can make sure he is getting enough to eat. Maybe, since he is teething really bad, that is the reason. I just don't know yet, but I am losing heart everytime he refuses to eat. Hopefully we can try better as time goes on. And hopefully this is just a phase he is going through. We'll find out. Anyways, just me venting some frustrations.
Monday, April 18, 2011
It's been a while.....
So, it has definitely been a LONG time since I last blogged...I feel as though I should apologize, but I really see no reason too. :) For a quick life update, we are now back in Rexburg, ID, and Xander finished up the semester on the 9th, and is getting ready to start the next one tomorrow.
Alex and I have been through a LOT these past three and a half months. Especially when going from tons of family around to just mom in a little over 3 days time, it is a LOT to adjust to. Alex had to learn that he wasn't going to get as much attention 24/7, and I had to almost re-learn how to take care of my own baby, without any helpers. Through lots of tears, frustration, screaming and crying - I've made it through. ;) Oh, and Alex too. It has actually been quite a fun experience for me though, and I can say that now that we have all adjusted of course. I feel like I know Alex a lot better than before; I also feel more confident when making decisions for him. I will admit, there are still many times when I get frustrated with him, and just want him to "Do what Mommy says! No questions." But then I have to remind myself that he is just a baby, and hasn't a clue what I'm talking about yet. I know he understands some things, and is understanding more everyday, so I am the one who just has to be patient. Which is very hard for me.
One thing is definitely for certain. Motherhood is no walk in the park. And more often then not, you always seem to end up the "bad guy" at least once or twice a day. Understanding that a baby's wants are his needs has also been hard for me. Because I have to tell myself that he may WANT to eat the TV and computer cords, but it is better that he not. Motherhood is also a very unselfish calling. There really isn't any room for selfishness when raising a baby! Because they take up all of your time and attention. So yes, I have learned and re-learned a lot these past couple of months, and am still alive to tell it all. Hopefully I'll be able to get back into blogging a bit more, especially as I get a nice routine down for Alex. In the meantime, here are some pictures and hopefully the video works too. He has definitely grown a lot! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)